Category Archives: Some people's kids

Ever been sucked into the YouTube Abyss?

Whenever BratzBasher catches me watching YouTube videos, she says, “Don’t get sucked in!” It’s usually too late. If she comes back and I’m still at it, she tries to physically remove me from temptation. Sometimes it works. Sometimes I say, “You have to see this!” and she gets sucked in, too.

Yesterday, I discovered “Kid Snippets” by Bored Shorts TV. They record kids acting out scenarios (without a script) and then dub the audio onto a second video recording of adults acting out the parts. It’s dang funny. One of my favorites is the Batman v Superman Trailer. I haven’t seen that particular movie, but perhaps this parody trailer will prove more entertaining.

It occurs to me that these videos are most easily appreciated by parents who have heard/seen their own kids playing pretend — whether making up their own stories or already using well established fandoms. The things kids ad lib can be pretty hysterical, such as in the Kid Snippets version of the famous Star Wars Cantina scene when Obi Wan and Luke try to place an order at the bar and are told there’s only “blue milk”.

If you’re a parent, or someone who can appreciate children’s improv, and have some time to spare — or, better yet, have a buddy that will agree to come pull you out of the abyss if they haven’t heard from you after a certain time period has passed — check out Bored Shorts TV on YouTube. It’s pretty awesome.

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We know how your parents drive.

Last night, Merkin and I attended a baptism for two boys in our ward.  The sister who spoke before the ordinance was performed did a great job.  She put up a poster of a road with various road signs along the way and talked about how each one was a reminder of signs and choices in our lives.  She pointed to each sign along the road and asked the kids what it meant.  When she pointed to the speed limit sign and said, “What does this one mean?”  one of the boys piped up, “It means slow down!”  It took nearly a full minute for the laughter to die down.  Don’t you just love kids?

slow down


Teenagers behind the wheel

I was driving BratzBasher to school today when I noticed a teenager tailgating me and weaving side to side within the lane.  It made me nervous, which I think was his intention because I suddenly realized that I was speeding up to get away from the dangerous behavior.  So I slowed down.  More weaving.  I reached a stop sign, turned around, and gave him the “What the heck?!” gesture (raised hands, palms up, with a shrug and an incredulous look on my face — not the finger).  He stopped driving crazy until I pulled into the back parking lot at BB’s school.  Then he revved his engine and zoomed away.  They really need a police car keeping an eye on that route to the school.  Lots of teenagers take it to avoid the police that patrol the front route.  Some kids just aren’t mature enough to drive.  Actually, some adults aren’t mature enough to drive.  Too bad they can’t develop a reliable test for that: maturity displayed while driving.


I wouldn’t exactly call them “free”.

free punches in faceNo, really.

All the people I want to punch in the face have actually earned it.

I just wish people would stop picking on my kid, that’s all.


I know I’m preaching to the choir here, but…

I am so sick of seeing so many girls at BB’s school dressed up in slutty fashion.  I know there’s a dress code.  Who decided it was unenforceable?  What’s so difficult about telling a kid to put on some decent clothes or go home?  They’ve got the boys trained to wear belts while in school.  Why can’t they fix the female problem?  The kids have got gym clothes at the ready.  Let them wear those until they can come to school in more appropriate attire.  The worst of it is that the parents of all those kids probably know full well what they’re wearing.  Most of them have paid for the “clothes”, for crying out loud.  It just makes me sick.  I saw a girl today with more holes in her jeans than denim.  I’m not asking for Molly Mormon standards.  I just want to see the perfectly reasonable school dress code enforced.  What’s a mom to do?  No, really.  I’d like to know.


More bad poetry

BratzBasher’s teacher read some of the kids’ valentines out loud in class today.  Here are snippets from two that BB found particularly memorable:

“Eurydice, Eurydice

How do I confess my love for thee?

Your eyes, your hands, your hair, your body

May I say you’re quite the hottie?”

and

“I did not wish for us to part.

Your kisses taste like fresh pop tarts.”

What do you think?  Is either of them the next Lord Byron?  If you had to write a cheesy valentine, what would be your best line?

 


Some days…

…I wish I could follow BratzBasher around, telling teachers when they’re wrong (or just being lame) and kicking bullies’ butts.

Why is that one kid not at least getting into trouble for wasting class time as he publicly humiliates my daughter?  But he did get sent into the hall for not paying attention when the teacher was talking.  Priorities.  I know I don’t always get the full story, but I believe this one.  It’s too normal to be false, I’m afraid.