Waiting for Chocolate and the Tooth Fairy

BratzBasher’s tooth finally came out.  Turns out it was pretty well detached — just wedged in real tight between its neighbors.  BB has rinsed it off, written a lovely missive to TF, and placed it under her pillow.  Unfortunately, she’ll have to wait until morning to get her answer to that age-old question: What does the Tooth Fairy do with all those teeth?  By the way, nobody has offered any suggestions for an answer, and I haven’t got anything better than the toothbrush fertilizer idea.  This isn’t the first time BB has asked the Tooth Fairy a question.  Last time she wanted to know what TF’s house looked like.  She got a lovely miniature drawing of a cottage.  I think she still has it somewhere in one of her many forgotten treasure stashes.

Long before TF comes, though, BB will finally get a piece of chocolate cake.  I told her she had to finish her vegetables first (mmm…roasted corn with onions and peppers).  She claimed she was full of corn, but did have a bit of room left for cake.  I told her that if she had room for cake, she had room for corn and could wait till she was hungry again before having her cake.  Just before giving in to my unreasonable nutritional demands, she had resorted to lying down on the dining room floor and whining, “I want caaaaake!”  I pointed out that she was ten, not two, and was a bit old for having lie-down-on-the-floor tantrums.  “I’m not having a tantrum!”  Merkin agreed with me.  Within a couple of minutes, the veggies had been eaten.  Sadly, she’s too full for cake right now.  She’ll have to wait until her tummy makes more room.

I’m listening to a really weird YA novel called Elsewhere by Gabrielle Zevin.  15-year-old Liz dies and goes to the afterlife where, apparently, everyone ages backwards until they’re a baby again and can return to live on Earth in as a new person.  The afterlife is called “Elsewhere” and is pretty much like life on Earth.  People have jobs, money, they can get injured (though they can’t die, of course), and they can pretty much do anything they did on Earth.  The first part of the novel deals with Liz accepting the fact that she’s dead and moving on with her new “life”.  Now the story has sort of moved focus onto another person that she’s met there.  I can’t say more than that without giving anything away.  I’m actually enjoying it, but it is very strange.

My favorite part is when Liz starts work as an “acclimation advisor” in the animal division.  She counsels newly deceased dogs.  She finds her first advisee drinking out of the toilet.  Liz tells her she doesn’t have to drink from there, and Sadie (the dog) says, “What do you mean?  That’s what they built it for, right?  I can even get fresher water by pushing this lever down.”

“Actually, it’s not for drinking; it’s a place where people go.”

“Go where?”

“Not where — just go.”

Eewwww!  You mean to tell me I’ve spent years drinking out of a bowl that people pee in?  That’s disgusting!  Why didn’t anyone ever tell me?”


About foo4luv

I'm a married, bum-around-the-house mom with one child, BratzBasher, who is the only thing in the universe cuter than a bunny nose. I enjoy reading, crafts, sewing unusual Halloween costumes, and taking long walks through Jo-Ann. View all posts by foo4luv

2 responses to “Waiting for Chocolate and the Tooth Fairy

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